Constantine the TV Show - The story of a man and his rag tag group of friends, reluctantly drawn into battling the evil unseen army of monsters that lurk just out of sight. NoÖ wait, thatís Grimm. Thatís the show that airs just before Constantine on NBC in America.
Constantine the TV Show - the story of a man caught in the crossfire between Heaven and Hell. With help from an angel he puts the demons back below. NoÖwait, thatís Supernatural.
And thatís where we have the problem; Constantine the series, is watchable - it was even getting better as it progressed - but it was nothing we havenít seen before. It wasnít original or compelling or innovative or harsh or scary or sickening or horrific or powerful. Basically everything it was in the comics got left out of the show. Yes you had a man in a dirty rain coat say bollocks a lot and deal with magic - but for me anyway - they missed the whole point.
If I had to describe John Constantine to a flat-liner in two words it wouldnít be lovable rogue (like the sackless New 52 has made him into) or psychic conman or reluctant hero - I would describe him as a cunt - because thatís essentially how he acts. He is all about himself, he's always figuring out how he can gain. Yes he helps people, but thatís usually because it gets him something he wants in return.
In the show they had guest stars almost every episode come in to say how much of a terrible man he was, whilst simultaneously showing him do incredibly selfless acts. Donít tell me he is a shit, show me he is a shit. Fuck Ďman wanting redemptioní, itís been done to death and back.
DC executives made every episode about a 'freak of the week', with an overarching story in the background - like every other show on air right now - itís formulaic to the extreme. Thatís why no one was watching it because we already were - on every other show on TV.
What we should have got in Constantine was the new Walter White. 5 steps ahead of everyone, playing characters off each other, manipulating situations and people to further his own agenda, needing to be more powerful, needing to say fuck you to everyone. But instead what we got was a ball-less amalgamation of every other hero character we see on TV. Only this one said wanker in a British accent.
I know people will call me a hater (believing that it somehow nullifies my point of view), for writing this. I wish I was a hater, but the trouble is I, like you - and all my geek brethren - love too much. I donít want to see a watered down shitty version of a character, that I fucking adore. I donít want to see it for many reasons, but the real reason I hate seeing characters misrepresented on TV and cinema is the fact that then it bleeds back into the medium I truly love beyond all else - comics.
Comics, TV and Film have had a long intertwined history of lending and borrowing off each other, but most of the time it's comics that lose in that situation. I donít want genuinely innovative stories and characters in comics to be watered down to the lowest common denominator, to appeal to everyone. I want John Constantine going to fetish clubs and sucking and fucking every man, woman and gimp dry. I want him putting the whammy on a prisoner, so the rest of the inmate's ultimately rape the bad guy to death. I want him using his friends trying to get rid of his own cancer. I want him showing us our own apathetic evil, in the way we deal with homelessness and prostitution. I want him struggling to find a reason to save himself or us. I want him to love us and hate us in equal measure. I want him to be the last guy you would call when the shit goes down, but be the only guy who can deal with it.
Basically I want 'The' John Constantine.